Arun V. J.: How to Find a Mentor When You Know No One
Arun V. J., The Leader of Transfusion Medicine at Malabar Medical College, shared a post on LinkedIn:
” ‘What I wish I knew about mentorship in my first decade’
I didn’t have a mentor for the first decade of my career.
Not because good people didn’t exist. I just didn’t know what I was looking for. So I solved problems that were already solved. Made mistakes I didn’t have to make.
Stagnated while people around me accelerated.
Once I figured out what mentorship actually was, everything changed.
Here’s what I learned:
Most people search for ‘a mentor’ like it’s one thing. Too vague. Get specific about your gap instead.
- Do you need expertise? Find someone doing the thing daily—proximity mentor.
- Do you need direction? Find someone who pivoted before you—async mentor.
- Do you need permission? Find proof it’s possible—YouTube, Substack, books.
- Do you need accountability? Find 3–4 peers at your level—peer circle.
- Do you need a blind spot exposed? Go to spaces outside your field—accidental mentors show up there.
Then ask properly. Not ‘Will you be my mentor?’ (terrifies people).
Instead: ‘I’m working on X. You’ve navigated this. I have 3 questions. Could we grab 30 minutes?’
After the first conversation, actually implement something. Follow up. If it clicks, offer something back.
The mentors who moved my career weren’t perfect fits. They just answered a specific question I had. Then the relationship deepened.
You don’t need the perfect mentor. You need to get clear on what you’re actually looking for.
What gap are you facing right now? And who in your circle is already one step ahead on that path?
‘Subscribe for the full framework—I only write this once.’ ”
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